Parents, brace yourselves. It is that time of the year again when you will get calls from relatives you haven’t heard from in years. Some of them will call you to boast about how well their own child has performed while the other nosy ones will try to figure out what your kid has scored.
Apart from the societal and parental pressure, students do have certain expectations and hope from themselves, which adds to the tormenting weight on their shoulders.
Irrespective of whether your ward has aced these exams or not done as per their own expectations, it is important for the parents to know how to deal with the stress and anxiety that come with these board results.
The problem is actually with the stigma of ‘the make-or-break of the future’ attached with boards, especially in the 12th grade. So, what do you do when your child is inconsolable after the results?
What should the parents do?
For starters, don’t keep checking the website every two to three before the results are announced. Try and keep the ambience of the house normal and avoid discussing the result and/or its aftermath.
Secondly, try and empathise with your child and don’t have unrealistic expectations. If the results are not favourable or as per expectations, don’t discuss and compare the marks of toppers or their friends who did well. Playing the guilt card with your child will only make him/her more upset.
As a parent, your expectations from your child’s result should be based on his/her previous performances instead of expecting a miracle.
Tell your children that this result does not define them as a person or marks their intelligence. Moreover, strictly avoid the “log kya kahengey” conversation, no matter where the discussion heads to. Praise your ward for his/her sincerity and dedication put in the exams and tell them that the whole family is there for support.
When things don’t go as planned, it is your responsibility to tell your child that it is okay to try again. Nothing is permanent and one can always set a new goal and achieve a new dream. Explain it to them that scoring below their expectations is not the end of the world, unlike how it feels at the moment.
The bottom line
Be there for your child after the results have been declared and gauge their reactions. If your ward seems stressed, go out and engage in relaxation activities. Most importantly, have a one-to-one conversation with your child about what he or she is feeling and try to calm them down. More often than not, the support of the parents is the one thing kids need the most after their results.